Pros and Cons of Having Roommates

Pros:

  • Hello, cost splitting! You can totally afford all the expensive movie channels and high speed internet when three people are paying for it.
  • Stuff, you have more of it! And it’s usually nicer than yours. A TV made later than the 80s. A table so you no longer have to eat on the floor. More than 3 forks.
  • Ingredients available in emergencies! Ran out of milk before the adequate milk/Cheerios ratio is achieved? Thought you had a can of cream of mushroom soup somewhere only to find otherwise at the crucial moment? You’ll never have to attempt to make a white sauce with naught but flour and water again! Because, damn, that was nasty.
  • You won’t turn into a hermit that watches TLC all day and is in danger of being suffocated by 30 cats. Because they won’t let you.
  • More people show up to your parties. You therefore get more free stuff when people get drunk and leave things behind.
  • You can have your roommates’ boyfriends do stuff for you. Like install your window A/C unit because you have an irrational fear that it will fall out of the window while you’re trying to install it and kill a passerby on the sidewalk below. Even though you live on the first floor…and your window doesn’t face the sidewalk…

Cons:

  • You can’t walk around naked, pick your nose whenever it suits you or fart freely and without guilt. These things, for some reason, must be confined to your room.
  • You have to deal with their pets. This is awesome when they’re cute and cuddly, but really annoying when they meow for 20 minutes straight outside your bedroom door at 5:00 in the morning. Or take massive, stinky shits in your house. Tip: do not share a pet with multiple people, you always get screwed money-wise and it leads to emotional scarring when someone declares the pet as theirs when you all move out.
  • Occasionally you will be suspicious that the level of whiskey in your Jameson bottle is slightly lower than what it was. This coincides with disappearing food.
  • You have to deal with their significant others always being around. This sucks if they’re socially awkward and refuse to talk to you without your roommate also being present. Or if she’s a screamer.
  • Inevitably, freak flags will fly. Someone will turn out to be an obsessive-compulsive clean freak, but only about really weird things like proper organization of the dish washer. Someone will turn out to be a lazy stoner that monopolizes the couch and TV in the supposedly shared living room.
  • You’ll find passive agressive notes everywhere saying things like “we’re low on toilet paper” and “please do your dishes in a timely manner”

 

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2 Responses to Pros and Cons of Having Roommates

  1. Morgan says:

    🙂 ha

  2. Courtney says:

    Haha. Yessss. I am the clean freak! Example… right now.

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